r u a VIRGIN???

Gimme some sunshine, gimme some rain!!! gimme another chance, wanna grow up once again!!!

there is this famous song of 3 idiots.
was thinkin wat if its told in a funny manner by maharastrian, gujrati & bihari
did not know other languages or else wud hv put tht.
Anyways, pls feel free to add.
Njoy

Baburao:
Ye baba, mala thoda uun dhyaa, ani thoda paus,
jasti paus nako re baba, mazza flat ground floor madhe aahe,
ani maaje fakt ek chance payje, fakt ek extra,
te nantar me mast mota honar....hehehe

Ramnik Bhai:
have jo hu tamne final quote aapun,
to mane thodu tadko aapo,
jo sawar no tadko hoy to saaru, karanke bappor nu hoy to maru maathu dukkhe
ane thodi varsaad, vadhare nahite pachi ena upar ek chance, bas
biju kai pan nai, su che ne ke mane fari thi motu thavu che,
arrey chokkas guarantee bapu, koi complain nahi made

Gajodhar:
yaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwnnnnnnn
ab ka bataye bhaiya, naya phormula hai shaaaaa(yawn)aayad
ekto thoda dhup, u pe thoda baaris, aur phir bas ek aur chance.
ka dekh rahe ho??? are serious hai bhaiyaa, hume wapas se bada hona hai
ka soch rahe ho? atpata lag raha hai tumka?
arrey humme bhi laga tha, aisan laga ki koi ped hai ka???hahhahaha
par sach kahen; hamare saale ke phuphaji ke damad ne ye todka kiya
ab dekh(yawn)oooooooo kahan pahunch gaye.
Sab maya hai!!!

Uff !!! Ye andaaz e bayan; haal e dil ek employee ka

The name is good, the brand is big
But the work I do is that of a pig
The work or the brand; what is my way?
I don't know if I should stay.

To work, they have set their own way
Nobody will care to hear what I say
My will be NULL, they wont change their way
I don't know if I should stay.

The project is in a critical stage
But to do good work, this is the age
This dilemma is killing me day by day
I don't know if I should stay.

The money is good, the place is great
But the development is at a very small rate
Should I go for the work, or wait for pay
I don't know if I should stay!

The managers don't know what they talk
The team doesn't know where they walk
That's a bad situation, what say?
I don't know if I should stay.

I can go to any other place
But what if I get the same disgrace
I can't keep switching day by day
I don't know if I should stay.

The -ves are more, the +ves are less
Then why have this unnecessary mess
No more will I walk their way,
It's all done, I won't stay.

Thanks & Regards,
Confused Employee

Interpretation goes on...

Swine flu coverage on media led to media hype, which in turn led to a dip in tourism

Tiger poaching is increasing for their bones, as its used to cure male impotency

Food crops were used to create bio-fuels, as fuel prices rose, leading to famine like conditions around the world

Outdoor Sports are completely sidelined by video games, which has made youngsters obese

Marketing vs PR vs Advertising.... Finally BRANDING!!!

F.A.I.Q. (Frequently Asked IRRITATING Questions)

Thus, the pain continues!!!

Perhaps we need a second, 2nd October

Ask an average Indian what significance does 2nd October hold in his life. The expected answer u will get is “that’s Gandhi Jayanti”, ask again n focus on the word significance in life, the answer this time would be, ”Kya significance! Nothing special, he was father of the nation, politicians get a reason to promote themselves & we get a holiday, if lucky enough then a long weekend!!!”

That’s it??? Actually that’s it!!!

I am no big fan of Mr. Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi but neither do I detest him. On Gandhi Jayanthi came across movies like Gandhi My Father & Lage Raho Munnabhai. Both have separate views on him but somewhere left a kind of red & blue impression on me. What exactly this thin man had in him, that he even after 60 yrs of independence has such a market value???

Ø He paid a big price to be a Mahatma. Its said that he was father of the nation but perhaps he was never a good father for his own kids. He lost everybody of his own, his eldest son, his wife, his brother & was made Mahatma. The question is, is that the price one has to pay to be a Mahatma? And was that price worth for today’s generation?
Ø For him, if there was something wrong he did not wait for someone to come & handle the situation, he with a smile used to do it on his own. We all know the story when he was in a village where on the middle of the road there was shit lying. He saw the people they were indifferent & jus passing by it. He took the leaves lying nearby the tree & wiped it himself, the villagers were stunned & then they made sure it did not happen again
Ø He took a stand. We in our everyday walks of life meet people who believe in a quote, which is “Ram ni pan jay ane Raavan ni pan jay” (Hail Ram as well as Ravan). The idea is simple if I take a side I loose out on benefits from other side, might as well I sit n the fence & enjoy. Whereas for him, if something is wrong it is wrong, don’t let your tummy digest it, or else the same dish will be served across.
Ø He was the brand ambassador for Non violence & truth. As far as non violence is concerned what he meant was that he can retaliate in the same force or may be worse, but choose not to do. The today’s version is I know I cant retaliate, but why to tell this, might as well say that I am non violent. Regarding truth, he ideology was simple, everyone of us make mistakes & try to cover it; well that is human; but the real courage is to accept it before getting caught, ask for forgiveness & never do it again. Truth is truth, never be afraid of saying it. There might be initial hiccups, but the person at the other end will respect your courage.

Right from our economy to lifestyle, we seem to have become experts in finding short term solutions. Basically “abhi kar dete hai, jo hoga dekha jayega”.
I mean see around us; the 5 day test match has become T20 format now.
Since years some 4 -5 business news channels have come up. Everyday they say diversify & stay for long. Majority of trading in India squares off on the same day.
We feel patriotic only on 26th Jan, 15th Aug & may be 2nd Oct. Another short term solution for us, of us & by us.
We wait for the world around us to improve & then improve ourselves. Whereas what Gandhi believed was ‘be the change you want to see in the world’
For me Gandhi stands for a person who paid a big price for what he is now. He wanted India to be a free nation & Indians to be courageous & not afraid to tell the truth.

Calvin & Hobbes

- I like maxims that don't encourage behavior modification.
- Reality continues to ruin my life.
- Weekends don't count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless.
- A little rudeness and disrespect can elevate a meaningless interaction to a battle of wills and add drama to an otherwise dull day.
- It's psychosomatic. You need a lobotomy. I'll get a saw.
- I understand my tests are popular reading in the teachers' lounge.
- Life's disappointments are harder to take when you don't know any swear words.
- Where do we keep all our chainsaws, Mom?

# CALVIN
- That's the difference between me and the rest of the world! Happiness isn't good enough for me! I demand euphoria!
- In my opinion, we don't devote nearly enough scientific research to finding a cure for jerks.
- You know, Hobbes, some days even my lucky rocketship underpants don't help.
- Its no use! Everybody gets good enemies except me.
- What's the point of wearing your favorite rocketship underpants if nobody ever asks to see 'em?
- As a math atheist, I should be excused from this.
- This one's tricky. You have to use imaginary numbers, like eleventeen ...
- I'm learning real skills that I can apply throughout the rest of my life ... Procrastinating and rationalizing.
- I have a hammer! I can put things together! I can knock things apart! I can alter my environment at will and make an incredible din all the while! Ah, it's great to be male!
- I'm not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information

"Verbatims"

~
"Do you believe in the devil? You know, a supreme evil being dedicated to the temptation, corruption, and destruction of man?" "I'm not sure that man needs the help."
~
Calvin: I'm a genius, but I'm a misunderstood genius. Hobbes: What's misunderstood about you? Calvin: Nobody thinks I'm a genius.
~
Calvin : You can't just turn on creativity like a faucet. You have to be in the right mood. Hobbes : What mood is that? Calvin : Last-minute panic.
~
"Why isn't my life like a situation comedy? Why don't I have a bunch of friends with nothing better to do but drop by and instigate wacky adventures? Why aren't my conversations peppered with spontaneous witticisms? Why don't my friends demonstrate heartfelt concern for my well being when I have problems? ...I gotta get my life some writers."
~
"I'm a simple man, Hobbes." "You?? Yesterday you wanted a nuclear powered car that could turn into a jet with laser-guided heat-seeking missiles!" "I'm a simple man with complex tastes."
~
"See Any UFOs?" "Not yet." "Well, keep your eyes open, they're bound to land here sometime." "What will we do when they come?" "See if we can sell mom and dad into slavery for a star cruiser"
~
"My powerful brain has come up with a topic for my paper" "Great" "I'll write about the debate over Tyrannosaurs. Were they fearsome predators or disgusting scavengers?" "Which side will you defend?" "Oh, I believe they weer fearsome predators, definitely." "How come?" "They're *so* much cooler that way"
~
"I'm not going to so my maths homework. Look at these unsolved problems. Here's a number in mortal combat with another. One of them is going to get subtracted. But why? What will be left of him? If I answered these, it would kill the suspense. It would resolve the conflict and turn intriguing possibilities into boring old facts." "I never really thought about the literary possibilities of maths." "I prefer to savour the mystery."
~
Susie: You'd get a good grade without doing any work. Calvin: So? Susie: It's wrong to get rewards you haven't earned. Calvin: I've never heard of anyone who couldn't live with that.
~
"Bad news Dad. Your polls are way down." "My polls?" "You rate especialy low among tigers and six year old white males."
~
"Mom's not feeling well. So I'm making her a get well card." "That's thoughtful of you." "See, on the front it says, 'Get Well Soon' ... and on the inside it says,'Because me bed isn't made, my clothes need to be put away and I'm hungry. Love Calvin.' Want to sign it?" "Sure, I'm hungry too"
~
H : "What do you think is the secret to happiness? Is it money, power or fame?" C : "I'd choose money. If you have enough money, you can buy fame and power. That way you'r have it all and be really happy. Happiness is being famous for your financial ability to indulge in every kind of excess." H : "I suppose thats *one* way to define it." C : "The part I think I'd like best is crushing people who get in my way."
~
Dear Santa. Why is your operation located at the North Pole? I'm guessing cheap elf labour, lower environmental standards, and tax breaks. Is this really the example you want to set for us impressionable kids? ...My plan is to put him on the defensive before he considers how good I've been.
~
"MOM, CAN I SET FIRE TO MY BED MATTRESS?" "No, Calvin." "CAN I RIDE MY TRICYCLE ON THE ROOF?" "No, Calvin." "Then can I have a cookie?" "No, Calvin." "She's on to me."
~
"What state do you live in?" "Denial."
- Miss Wormwood & Calvin"Dad, I'd like to have a little talk." "Um...ok." "As the wage earner here, its your responsibility to show some consumer confidence and start buying things that will get the economy going and create profits and employment. Here's a list of some big-ticket items I'd like for Christmas. I hope I can trust you to do whats right for our country." "I've got to stop leaving the Wall Street Journal around."
#

INNOCENCE
============
- I go to school, but I never learn what I want to know.
- Hobbes : "Do you think there's a God? Calvin : "Well somebody's out to get me!"
- Calvin : "Do you really think Bogeymen exist?" Hobbes : "I'm not sure, but if they do, I think this is where they live…" - "The world isn't fair, Calvin." "I know Dad, but why isn't it ever unfair in my favour?"
- "Too bad the world will be ending soon." "Beg your pardon?" "Halley's Comet. Comets are harbingers of doom." "No they arent, thats just superstition." "Really? Guess I'd better write that book report."
- "Since September it's just gotten colder and colder. There's less daylight now, I've noticed too. This can only mean one thing - the sun is going out. In a few more months the Earth will be a dark and lifeless ball of ice. Dad says the sun isnt going out. He says its colder because the earth's orbit is taking us farther from the sun. He says winter will be here soon. Isn't it sad how some people's grip on their lives is so precarious that they'll embrace any preposterous delusion rather than face an occasional bleak truth?"
- Calvin, about to become aware of the concept of winter..."This article says that many people find christmas the most stressful time of year." "I believe it. This season sure fills *me* with stress." "Really? How come?" " I *hate* being good..."
~
"Any monsters under my bed tonight?"
"Nope." "No." "Uh-Uh."
"Well there *better* not be, I'd hate to have to torch one with my flamethrower!"
"You have a flamethrower?"
"They lie. I lie."

- Calvin, The Monsters Under His Bed & Hobbes"I wonder where we go when we die?" "...Pittsburgh?" "You mean if we're good or if we're bad?"
#
SOCIETY
========
I think life should be more like tv. I think all of life's problems ought to be solved in 30 minutes with simple homilies, don't you? I think weight and oral hygiene ought to be our biggest concerns. I think we should all have powerful, high-paying jobs, and everyone should drive fancy sports cars. All our desires should be instantly gratified. Women should always wear tight clothes, and men should carry powerful handguns. Life overall should be more glamorous, thrill-packed, and filled with applause, don't you think?
So basically, this maverick is urging everyone to express his individuality through conformity in brand-name selection.
In my opinion, television validates existence.
~
"Here's a movie we should watch." "Who's in it?" "It says 'Japanese Cast'...two big rubbery monsters slug it out over major metropolitan centres in a battle for world supremacy...doesn't that sound great?" "And people say that foreign film is inaccessible."
~
Hobbes : "It says here that by the age of 6, most children have seen a million muders on television." Calvin : "I find that very disturbing...it means I've been watching all the wrong channels."
~
H : "What are you doing?" C : "Being cool." H : "You look more like you're bored." C : "The world bores you when you're cool."
~
"I just read this great science-fiction story. It's about how machines take control of humans and turn them into zombie slaves." "So instead of us controlling machines, they control us? Pretty scary idea." "I''ll say...*HEY* What time is it? My TV show is on."
#
DEEP
====
To make a bad day worse, spend it wishing for the impossible.
So the secret to good self-esteem is to lower your expectations to the point where they're already met?
It's only work if somebody makes you do it
#
GURLS
=======
My only regret is blowing the best day of my life while I'm so young
- Calvin prepares a water-balloon ambush for SusieCalvin: Our top-secret club, G.R.O.S.S.-- Get Rid Of Slimy girlS! Susie: Slimy girls?! Calvin: I know that's redundant, but otherwise it doesn't spell anything.
I'm looking for something that can deliver a 50-pound payload of snow on a small feminine target. Can you suggest something? Hello...?
Girls are like slugs - they probably serve some purpose, but it's hard to imagine what.
~
We are a fierce and dirty band of cut-throat pirates! Keep a sharp lookout matey, we dont want any sissy girls on our ship!" "We *dont* like girls???" "Of course not dummy, we're a murderous bunch of pirates, remember?" "Who do we smooch then?"
~
"There's a new girl in our class." "Well, whats her name?" "WHO KNOWS?" "Is she nice?" "WHO CARES? Not me!" "Do you LIKE her?" "NO!"
~
"Here comes that new girl. HEY SUSIE DERKINS, IS THAT YOUR FACE OR IS A POSSUM STUCK IN YOUR COLLAR? I HOPE YOU SUFFER A DEBILITATING BRAIN ANEURISM, YOU FREAK!" "She *cute*, isnt she?" "GO AWAY!"
~
"Hello Susie, this is Calvin. I lost our homework assignment. Can you tell me what we were supposed to read for tomorrow?" "Are you sure you're not calling for some other reason?" "Why else would I call you?" "Maybe you missed the melodious sound of my voice?" "WHAT? Are you crazy? All I want is the STUPID assignment!" "First say you missed the melodious sound of my voice." "THIS IS BLACKMAIL!"
~
"This meeting of the Get Rid Of Slimy Girls club will now come to order. First Tiger Hobbes will read the minutes of our last meeting."
"Thank you. (9:30) Meeting called to order. Dictator For Life Calvin proposed resoultion condemning the existence of girls. (9:35) First Tiger Hobbes abstains from vote. Motion fails. (9:36) Patriotism of First Tiger called into question. (9:37) Philosophical discussion. (10:15) Bandages administered. Dictator For Life rebuked for biting."
"Is this a great club or what?"
"(10:16) Forgot what debate was about. Medals of bravery awarded to all parties."
~
"I'm never gonna get married. Are you?" "Hmm...I suppose if the right person came along, I might. Someone with green eyes and a nice laugh, who I could call 'Pooty Pie'." "POOTY PIE?" "Or bitsy pookums." "I think that would affect my stomach a lot more than my heart." "Bitsy pookums I'd say. Yes snoogy woogy, she'd reply..."
~
"Do you like being a girl?" "Its gotta be better than the alternative." "Whats it like? Is it like being a bug?" "Like a WHAT?" "I imagine bugs and girls have a dim perception that nature played a crual trick on them, but they lack the intelligence to really comprehend the magnitude of it."
#

| :-) (-: | 8-) (-8 | ;-) (-; | :-p d-: |

Looking in the above image may result in different face positions like below.... :P hehehe

Caught ya, smilin....:P

Life is beautiful; indeed

I have long since stopped shouting for justice.
I have long since stopped shouting my innocence.
I have stopped shouting, I have lost the ability,
Because shouting is for the alive and I am dead in every sense.

I have no wish to live.
I have no desire to die.
My existence is that of a leaf,
A leaf which is now dry.

All emotions I have long forgotten.
Ideals I’ve stopped believing in.
Truth is just a fallacy.
For me believing is a sin.

I am a puppet without strings,
For me my family is long since dead.
I had to push my love away,
Because in me new feelings of hope she bred.

I used to be a man of substance
Everything I did was true.
I laugh at those times now.
What else can I even do?

I was a man of integrity
One whose ideals could never shake.
They broke me, raped me, murdered me,
They robbed me of my faith.

Two days ago they sentenced me to death,
After fourteen years of living in this hole.
But they can only kill my physical self,
Because they have long since killed my soul.

Some chain mail.......... Not all FWDs are bad though... ;)

a dog's life

Ek din ek kutta jungle main raasta kho gaya . Tabhi usane dekha ek sher
uskii taraf aa raha hai. Kutte ki saans rookh gayi. "Aaj to kaam tamaam
mera!" usne socha. Phir usne saamane kuchh sookhi haddiyan padi dekhi. Woh
aate hue sher ki taraf peeth kar ke baith gaya aur ek sookhi hadii ko
choosane laga aur zor zor se bolne laga, "wah! Sher ko khaane ka maza hi
kuchh aur hai. Ek aur mil jaaye to poori daawat ho jayegi!" Aur usne zor
se dakaar mara. Is bar sher sakate mein aa gayaa. Usne socha "ye kutta to
sher ka shikar karta hai! Jaan bacha kara bhago!" Aur sher wahan se
champat ho gaya .

Ped par baitha ek Bandar yeh sab tamasha dekh raha tha. Usne socha yeh
mauka achha hai sher ko sari kahani bata deta hoon - sher se dosti ho
jayegi aur usase zindagi bhar ke liye jaan ka khatra dur ho jayega. Woh
phataphat sher ke pichhe bhaga. Kutte ne Bandar ko jaate hue dekh liya aur
samajh gaya ki koi locha hai. Udhar Bandar ne sher ko sab bata diya ki
kaise kutte ne use bewakoof banaya hai. Sher zor se dahada, "chal mere
sath abhi uski leela kahatam karta hu" aur Bandar ko apani peeth par
baitha kar sher kutte ki taraf lapka.




Can u imagine the quick management by the DOG......... ......... ...


















Kutte ne sher ko aate dekha to ek bar phir uskii taraf peeth karke baith
gaya aur zor zor se bolne laga, "Is Bandar ko bhej ke 1 ghanta ho gaya ,
saala ek sher phaans kar nahi la sakta!"

Time shall unfold what plighted cunning hides: Who cover faults, at last shame them derides.....

“After my first…
I built this suit of armor
So strong, so invulnerable.
I came across you.
Slowly my guard was let down.
So, so vulnerable to pain and despair.
A love so perfect, so beautiful
Was the double edged sword.
One side so sweet
So dull of worry
So full of love.
The other so sharp of worry
So deadly with confusion
So overcome of aberrancy.
They meet at the apex.
The sword was the only thing,
The only thing to pierce through the armor.
Through the mind, the soul, the heart…
The sword tears a hole
The sharpest of sides is numb to pain,
The dull side brings a pain.
A pain so excruciating
the pain unreal the suffering so great.
This side pierces the mind, the soul, the heart..
The wound lasting and irreparable.
A pain never to leave.
A pain that allows you to live but in turn
It kills the mind, the soul, the heart
A pain that may lie dormant
Only to arise and hurt more than it ever did.
But through all doubt and suffering
The love was worth the pain.
The love so perfect so beautiful.
Was worth the pain
Was worth the death of me
Was worth losing everything I ever had.
Even if it was you that I lost.”

Anonymous.

to ERR is human; to FORGIVE.... is not my policy!!!

“Last night I had a revelation
Somehow I have to make you pay
It's all about manipulation
And what it takes to get my way
I don't believe in soft solutions
No one makes a fool of me
Without receiving retribution
No one hurts me and goes free

I'll play on your fears, I'll leave you in tears
You'll never be the same, my friend
You're walking a line, it's a matter of time
You'll never rest easy again

I've got the power to bring you down

I've heard it said, to err is human
It's forgiveness that's divine
I thought about forgiving you, but
I want revenge, I want what's mine
I think it's time to settle scores now
It's time to set the record straight
You'll know it's coming, you won't know how
Or when, you'll have to watch and wait

I'll play on your fears, I'll leave you in tears
You'll never be the same, my friend
You're walking a line, it's a matter of time
You'll never rest easy again

I've got the power to bring you down

You know, it feels intoxicating
To be intimidating
It's invigorating
To see you shaking

I've got the power to bring you down

You know something, you see it coming,
You know I will stop at nothing.”

(donno who wrote this, but loved it...)

naan CHENNAI oda SUPERSTARA; yen kitta vachekade baadu

its an instrument basically played by nak (toungue) & muk (nose).
Its a satire on a day in Chennai, where Cinema & Politics are nothing less than religion.
This ad won Cannes Gold 2009.

it will.....

During December, i was in Mumbai. It was post 26/11 & i had gone to gateway of India.

The sight of the monument seemed like that of a warrior being back stabbed n tryin to stand up on its feet. It was like someone spolied my picture perfect.

The iconic "architectural marvel" TAJ was shut down.

After every attack, Mumbai has lived upto its spirit n stood up. But, this attack took its time to heal on a personal level too.

Below is the pic, created as an ad by a friend of mine 'Sandeep'. That pic F5ed my memory of that day.

It speaks what i feel deep within. Hats off to u dude.

aap sirf GENTS hi nahi, intelliGENTS bhi ho.....;)

Remember the iconic comedy series "KHICHDI". Below are some funniest explaination...Njoy

> DECIDE

Hansa : Praful "Decide" matlab ?Praful : "Decide" Hansa ... vo Casettee player mein hum casettee nahi dalte usme hota hai na ... "A side" -- "B side" ... to "C-side" ... "D- side" ---> "Decide"

> MATURE

Hansa : Mature matlab ????praful: jab apna mahesh....chori karte hue pakda gaya tha.. tab usne kya kaha tha ?????hansa: usne kaha tha.. mujhe chodd do.. "MAIN CHOR NAHI HOON"main chor ...main chor....mature. ..acha acha....

> ALPHABET

Hansa: praful alphabet matlab??? praful: alphabet hansa,local train mein safar karte hoye maasi jaise hi koi seat khali dekhti hai to wo apni beti alpha se kya kehti hai?hansa: alpha beth seat pe,alpha beth,acha toh yeh alphabet.

> ASSET

Hansa : Praful "Asset" matlab ???Praful : Asset Hansaaa ....Jab hum gaadi mein jaate hai and jab gaadi signal par rukti hai .... taab vo bhikari log aa kar kya bolte hai ........"Aee Seth... thoda paisa do naa" ... "Eee Sethh ... " ... Asset ...

> DEPEND

Hansa : Yeh Depend kya hota hai Prafful??Prafful : Depend Hansa... wo Swimming Pool mein ek taraf to paani kam gehra hota hai, aur dusri side zyada gehra... Deep-End.. Depend.

> TOURNAMENT

HANSA:- ae he he PRAFUL, TOURNAMENT MATLABPRAFUL:- TOURNAMENT HANSA!!! YE JO TUMNE JHUMKE PEHNE HAIN, GEHNE PEHNE HAIN INKO ENGLISH ME KYA KEHTE HAIN, BOLO BOLO!!HANSA:- AAA HAN HAN TOURNAMENT, (HANSA KHUSH)MELISA:-(CHIDH KAR)ARE USE TOURNAMENT NAHI ORNAMENT KEHTE HAINHANSA:- ARE KUCHH BHI MAT BOLLLEK JHHUMKA -- ORNAMENTDO JHHUMKE -- TWO ORNAMENT# #TOURNAMENTAE PRAFUL!! YE MELISA KO BHI BABUJI KI TARAH KUCHH BHI NAHI ATAA.

> ELASTIC

Hansa: Praful elastic matlab??Praful: Elastic Hansa..apni voh Shradha ben unki beti ila .......usko jab fracture hua tha to voh kya leke chalti thi??Hansa : Ila to...Ila-stick leke ...Ila-stick !! Ila-stick!!!

Sensible Nonsense!!!

After a looong time, some random thing about Nonsense, which actually makes sense...
All Kudos to the writer, for making some sense w.r.t. Indian Minds...

v r the lawyers 4 this divorce...!!!

Its about the relationship between a man(client) and his wife(TG). They've agreed to meet in a restaurant. The man's feeling perfectly happy, until the woman makes a painful announcement: she wants a divorce. In the course of their conversation she makes it clear to him why she is leaving him. And he makes it very clear that he doesn't have an empathic bone in his body. At the end of the movie the woman walks away disappointed but determined. The man stays behind alone.

My uncle's son's wife's brothers's brother in law's son's BIG fat Indian Wedding.....:P

The topic may sound cheeeeeesy... but trust me, the images below are real goood insights to what happens in a typical "Hamare yahan di shaadi"...Hats off to the HT team for this....

njoyyyy

Theres a Akhbar Birbal story. Its said that Birbal's daughter's wedding was on the cards. Due to which Birbal was tensed...

Akhbar asked: " Whats the issue Birbal? Why u sooo tensed???"

Birbal: "Jahanpanah, you dont know abour marwari weddings. Its like how much ever you do, you will always receive critisisms!!!"

Akhbar: "Birbal, dont worry... Let me do the arrangements my way. I can guarantee you that there wont b any complains!!!"

Birbal: "Pls Jahanpanah, dont take this as a challenge. Trust me its impossible."

Akhbar refused to budge down.

The wedding was one of the most grand anyone could have ever seen... Best of the cuisines, musicians, performers.

He imported special Persian vases in which were filled with sweets 24 X 7, the guests were well escorted with luxurious pomp & style.

But, while leaving 2 female relatives of the groom were talking to each other which Akhbar over heard.

Those 2: "Dont know why the king was sooo stingy on the sweets. He has deliberately kept those sweets in the vases so that one cant take hand full of it.... huh!!!"

Akhbar was stunned by that remark. After that when he disclosed this to Birbal; Birbal smiled n said.

Birbal: "Didn't I say Jahanpanah its impossible to make the groom's big family happy...!!!"

Akhbar: "I agree!!!"

Well the moral of the story is not that Marwari wedding is some impossible task. But across India what we Indians are good at is finding faults, criticising & showing other people down... Its jus our attitude or rather our way of living...:)

Advt & Media industry ke common dialogue & funde

Below are some really interesting "verbatims" from apna industry public. 3 yrs in to this industry, these are the most common ones that i have come across... pls comment n add from ur side toooo!!!

- “Pak gaya hu re!!! same client, same public, same kaam; har roz ki mach mach...”
- “Planning to quit yaar. Ek agency mein kitna rehneka??? Networking bada hona chahiye; then only you will grow.”
- “Apna industry hi thakela hai…Chumma (bangalore way of sayin 'SIMPLY') u work soo much & get paid peanuts…”
- “Abe yaar koi opening ho to bol re…yahan mazza nahi hai re…too much of politics!!!”
- “Ek baar recession jaane de; I will be the first to put papers!!!”
- “Pehle achha tha; media party, gifts aur sab…Ab to mushkil se FPC bhi nahi aata, gift to durr ki baat hai…”
- “Mera boss is a slimy one; if I do better than him & showcase it to super boss he gives all teamwork n gyaan, but when he does it, its all ‘I did not show interest, passion, responsibility & bull shit…”
- “My biggest issue is that I cant explain anyone what I do basically!!!”
- “Bolne ko 5 days working hai re!!! either u work ur backlog every Saturday or if u r free than client / ops guy calls u at his own convenience to report some issue with the campaign.”
- “Client side jaane mein issue hai re…sirf media manager ka profile hai…thoda aur market knowledge, brand knowledge hota to branding side bhi ho sakta tha!!!”
- “Ghar par time spend nahi hota re…udhar bhi much much hai…”
- “Boss this is not my JOB... don’t pull me into unnecessary mess yaar…I anyways have too much on my plate…”
- “My boss asks me what I do whole day??? Abe hazaar kaam beech mein hote hai re, sab ka hisaab rakhu kya??? Kabhi kabar kuch miss ho jaata hai …”
- “Lets see how the appraisal goes??? I wish achha bonus mile…”
- “U know u guys are lucky. When we used to work our boss used to make us cry…thoda dedication laao yaar…tume logo sirf 6 months hue hai. This the time to slog buddy…”
- “My boss never needed to tell me to sit after hours n finish the job…it was sheer passion…These new kids are thinking this job as 9 to 5!!!”
- “Abe that guy is a permanent furniture in that agency…even if it shuts down he wont leave…Isliye usko koi bhaav nahi hai…Always show that u have a better market value…”
- “Koi learning as such nahi hai… bored of the brand yaar…”
- “This is his ex brand re… that’s y he will interfere a lot in ur work…don’t take it personally re... apne senior ko bol…”
- “That client is an ex media guy himself…that’s y he is soo finicky…”
- “Y everytime its my mistake only???”
- “This agency is bit formal in nature; u need to learn some protocols here… Its unlike ur old agency…U can't talk like that, u better know the difference between ur peers & seniors!!!”
- “Clients expect us to stick on deadlines!!! But do they ever revert on deadlines for approvals, or queries???”
- “From next month I m for sure going to join gym…”
- “I enjoy theatre, but apne job mein time kidhar hai yaar…pura week kaaam…”
- “Arrey yaar our boss doesn’t stand for us. Client itna stinker nahi deta hai, jitna apna boss.”
- ”U r lucky re, tera boss spends time with u , stands for u n helps u out. Idhar to test tube baby jaisa lagta hai”
- Weekend kaise nikla??? Pata hi nahi chala re”

Which Indian Politician last time matched this passion & genuineness???

Washington:
Text of President Barack Obama's inaugural address

OBAMA: My fellow citizens:

I stand here today humbled by the task before us, grateful for the trust you have bestowed, mindful of the sacrifices borne by our ancestors. I thank President Bush for his service to our nation, as well as the generosity and cooperation he has shown throughout this transition.

Forty-four Americans have now taken the presidential oath. The words have been spoken during rising tides of prosperity and the still waters of peace. Yet, every so often the oath is taken amidst gathering clouds and raging storms. At these moments, America has carried on not simply because of the skill or vision of those in high office, but because we the people have remained faithful to the ideals of our forebears, and true to our founding documents.

So it has been. So it must be with this generation of Americans.

That we are in the midst of crisis is now well understood. Our nation is at war, against a far-reaching network of violence and hatred. Our economy is badly weakened, a consequence of greed and irresponsibility on the part of some, but also our collective failure to make hard choices and prepare the nation for a new age. Homes have been lost; jobs shed; businesses shuttered. Our health care is too costly; our schools fail too many; and each day brings further evidence that the ways we use energy strengthen our adversaries and threaten our planet.

These are the indicators of crisis, subject to data and statistics. Less measurable but no less profound is a sapping of confidence across our land and a nagging fear that America's decline is inevitable, and that the next generation must lower its sights.

Today I say to you that the challenges we face are real. They are serious and they are many. They will not be met easily or in a short span of time. But know this, America and they will be met.

On this day, we gather because we have chosen hope over fear, unity of purpose over conflict and discord.

On this day, we come to proclaim an end to the petty grievances and false promises, the recriminations and worn out dogmas, that for far too long have strangled our politics.

We remain a young nation, but in the words of scripture, the time has come to set aside childish things. The time has come to reaffirm our enduring spirit; to choose our better history; to carry forward that precious gift, that noble idea, passed on from generation to generation: the God-given promise that all are equal, all are free and all deserve a chance to pursue their full measure of happiness.

In reaffirming the greatness of our nation, we understand that greatness is never a given. It must be earned. Our journey has never been one of shortcuts or settling for less. It has not been the path for the faint-hearted and for those who prefer leisure over work, or seek only the pleasures of riches and fame. Rather, it has been the risk-takers, the doers, the makers of things and some celebrated but more often men and women obscure in their labor, who have carried us up the long, rugged path towards prosperity and freedom.

For us, they packed up their few worldly possessions and traveled across oceans in search of a new life.

For us, they toiled in sweatshops and settled the West; endured the lash of the whip and plowed the hard earth.

For us, they fought and died, in places like Concord and Gettysburg; Normandy and Khe Sahn.

Time and again these men and women struggled and sacrificed and worked till their hands were raw so that we might live a better life. They saw America as bigger than the sum of our individual ambitions; greater than all the differences of birth or wealth or faction.

This is the journey we continue today. We remain the most prosperous, powerful nation on Earth. Our workers are no less productive than when this crisis began. Our minds are no less inventive, our goods and services no less needed than they were last week or last month or last year. Our capacity remains undiminished. But our time of standing pat, of protecting narrow interests and putting off unpleasant decisions and that time has surely passed. Starting today, we must pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and begin again the work of remaking America.

For everywhere we look, there is work to be done. The state of the economy calls for action, bold and swift, and we will act and not only to create new jobs, but to lay a new foundation for growth. We will build the roads and bridges, the electric grids and digital lines that feed our commerce and bind us together. We will restore science to its rightful place, and wield technology's wonders to raise health care's quality and lower its cost. We will harness the sun and the winds and the soil to fuel our cars and run our factories. And we will transform our schools and colleges and universities to meet the demands of a new age. All this we can do. And all this we will do.

Now, there are some who question the scale of our ambitions and who suggest that our system cannot tolerate too many big plans. Their memories are short. For they have forgotten what this country has already done; what free men and women can achieve when imagination is joined to common purpose, and necessity to courage.

What the cynics fail to understand is that the ground has shifted beneath them and that the stale political arguments that have consumed us for so long no longer apply. The question we ask today is not whether our government is too big or too small, but whether it works and whether it helps families find jobs at a decent wage, care they can afford, a retirement that is dignified. Where the answer is yes, we intend to move forward. Where the answer is no, programs will end. And those of us who manage the public's dollars will be held to account and to spend wisely, reform bad habits, and do our business in the light of day and because only then can we restore the vital trust between a people and their government.

Nor is the question before us whether the market is a force for good or ill. Its power to generate wealth and expand freedom is unmatched, but this crisis has reminded us that without a watchful eye, the market can spin out of control and and that a nation cannot prosper long when it favors only the prosperous. The success of our economy has always depended not just on the size of our gross domestic product, but on the reach of our prosperity; on our ability to extend opportunity to every willing heart and not out of charity, but because it is the surest route to our common good.

As for our common defense, we reject as false the choice between our safety and our ideals. Our founding fathers, faced with perils we can scarcely imagine, drafted a charter to assure the rule of law and the rights of man, a charter expanded by the blood of generations. Those ideals still light the world, and we will not give them up for expedience's sake. And so to all other peoples and governments who are watching today, from the grandest capitals to the small village where my father was born: know that America is a friend of each nation and every man, woman, and child who seeks a future of peace and dignity, and that we are ready to lead once more.

Recall that earlier generations faced down fascism and communism not just with missiles and tanks, but with sturdy alliances and enduring convictions. They understood that our power alone cannot protect us, nor does it entitle us to do as we please. Instead, they knew that our power grows through its prudent use; our security emanates from the justness of our cause, the force of our example, the tempering qualities of humility and restraint.

We are the keepers of this legacy. Guided by these principles once more, we can meet those new threats that demand even greater effort and even greater cooperation and understanding between nations. We will begin to responsibly leave Iraq to its people, and forge a hard-earned peace in Afghanistan. With old friends and former foes, we will work tirelessly to lessen the nuclear threat, and roll back the specter of a warming planet. We will not apologize for our way of life, nor will we waver in its defense, and for those who seek to advance their aims by inducing terror and slaughtering innocents, we say to you now that our spirit is stronger and cannot be broken; you cannot outlast us, and we will defeat you.

For we know that our patchwork heritage is a strength, not a weakness. We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus and and non-believers. We are shaped by every language and culture, drawn from every end of this Earth; and because we have tasted the bitter swill of civil war and segregation, and emerged from that dark chapter stronger and more united, we cannot help but believe that the old hatreds shall someday pass; that the lines of tribe shall soon dissolve; that as the world grows smaller, our common humanity shall reveal itself; and that America must play its role in ushering in a new era of peace.

To the Muslim world, we seek a new way forward, based on mutual interest and mutual respect. To those leaders around the globe who seek to sow conflict, or blame their society's ills on the West and know that your people will judge you on what you can build, not what you destroy. To those who cling to power through corruption and deceit and the silencing of dissent, know that you are on the wrong side of history; but that we will extend a hand if you are willing to unclench your fist.

To the people of poor nations, we pledge to work alongside you to make your farms flourish and let clean waters flow; to nourish starved bodies and feed hungry minds. And to those nations like ours that enjoy relative plenty, we say we can no longer afford indifference to suffering outside our borders; nor can we consume the world's resources without regard to effect. For the world has changed, and we must change with it.

As we consider the road that unfolds before us, we remember with humble gratitude those brave Americans who, at this very hour, patrol far-off deserts and distant mountains. They have something to tell us today, just as the fallen heroes who lie in Arlington whisper through the ages. We honor them not only because they are guardians of our liberty, but because they embody the spirit of service; a willingness to find meaning in something greater than themselves. And yet, at this moment and a moment that will define a generation and it is precisely this spirit that must inhabit us all.

For as much as government can do and must do, it is ultimately the faith and determination of the American people upon which this nation relies. It is the kindness to take in a stranger when the levees break, the selflessness of workers who would rather cut their hours than see a friend lose their job which sees us through our darkest hours. It is the firefighter's courage to storm a stairway filled with smoke, but also a parent's willingness to nurture a child, that finally decides our fate.

Our challenges may be new. The instruments with which we meet them may be new. But those values upon which our success depends and hard work and honesty, courage and fair play, tolerance and curiosity, loyalty and patriotism and these things are old. These things are true. They have been the quiet force of progress throughout our history. What is demanded then is a return to these truths. What is required of us now is a new era of responsibility and a recognition, on the part of every American, that we have duties to ourselves, our nation, and the world, duties that we do not grudgingly accept but rather seize gladly, firm in the knowledge that there is nothing so satisfying to the spirit, so defining of our character, than giving our all to a difficult task.

This is the price and the promise of citizenship.

This is the source of our confidence and the knowledge that God calls on us to shape an uncertain destiny.

This is the meaning of our liberty and our creed and why men and women and children of every race and every faith can join in celebration across this magnificent mall, and why a man whose father less than sixty years ago might not have been served at a local restaurant can now stand before you to take a most sacred oath.

So let us mark this day with remembrance, of who we are and how far we have traveled. In the year of America's birth, in the coldest of months, a small band of patriots huddled by dying campfires on the shores of an icy river. The capital was abandoned. The enemy was advancing. The snow was stained with blood. At a moment when the outcome of our revolution was most in doubt, the father of our nation ordered these words be read to the people:

"Let it be told to the future world ... that in the depth of winter, when nothing but hope and virtue could survive...that the city and the country, alarmed at one common danger, came forth to meet (it)."

America, in the face of our common dangers, in this winter of our hardship, let us remember these timeless words. With hope and virtue, let us brave once more the icy currents, and endure what storms may come. Let it be said by our children's children that when we were tested we refused to let this journey end, that we did not turn back nor did we falter; and with eyes fixed on the horizon and God's grace upon us, we carried forth that great gift of freedom and delivered it safely to future generations.